The comic pretty much explains it. Sometimes, you just need to fire people.

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Well, this has happened more than once. One minute their IMing me dirtyness, the next they're righteously indignant and proud about their faithfulness. Finally, I got sick of it, and just ended all of it. Granted, it's not easy to turn down someone texting you something filthy, but it's way more trouble than it's worth.

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Being W2'd is something that's happened to me a few times, as well as something that's happened to a few friends of mine. It happens to men and women, gay and straight. Some people treat relationships like jobs, and like most of us with jobs, we don't want to be without one, so before we quit, we check out the market. We interview, and then we accept a position before turning in our resigniation.

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Sorry for the delay. I was on vacation in Eastern Europe, getting marriage offers from strippers (I'm not joking).

Anyway, after the breakup, it happened so fast, it really astounded me. Men from all over the Internet were all over her like tongue-numbness on a condom. So when you do break up with the Internet nude model, be prepared for the onslaught. It will happen.

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Really, you can't make a relationship work if you're the jealous type. So much sperm will be spilled, that she's going to get a cillia beat down if sperm share the same plane of existence in the afterlife. For me, I like that people are looking at my girlfriend, but that's just me.

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Holy shit! Two comics in a week! Could I really be back? Perhaps.

This comic took a while, as it was the first I've done that is all digital. No paper was used, not a tree was harmed. I've been using The GIMP to make this, and I've got to say, there's a lot to be desired in terms of usability. Part of that is that I'm used to Photoshop, and part of it is that The GIMP needs a lot of fucking work. Some of the most mundane tasks that I take for granted in Photoshop are extremely difficult. Ah well. At least the price is right, and that price is free.

But back to dating Internet Porn Models. It is an interesting lifestyle. A better lifestyle. In this strip, I speak about the advantages, but there are disadvantages, which I'll get into.

Right, anyway, enjoy!

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Man, have I ever left this place in a state of dissary. There's thousand of comment spams, and I haven't done a comic in 2 years. But that's about to change.

The comic you're about to read is a true story. This actually happened. There is a video called "Booted Sluts 9", and they did talk to me.

I've been celibate for a little while now, and it's not by choice. This is my last, best hope of getting some. It was also by far my best method. Making money, doesn't do it. Writing a book? That worked once. Comics? Worked many, many times.

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Fall is my favorite time of year, and that's in no small part to the wonderful invention that is "The Hoodie". It's 10% cotton and 90% pure intellectual sex, it's wearable mojo.

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Anyone who knows me, and indeed anyone who's read my comics knows I'm a bit of a fan of Steve Jobs. He's so smart, and handsome, and vegan. *Swoon*

Steve Jobs recently underwent surgery to remove cancer, and I was worried about my Stevie. The prognosis is good, so my spirits are high.

I hope you get well soon Steve, so we can gallivant around Europe in your Gulf Stream V!

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When a relationship is over, no matter who initiated the actual breakup, men tend to have a rather unrealistic expectation in the behavior of their ex-girlfriend.

I call this the "Nun Syndrome".

No matter how man girls we hook up with after the breakup, hearing of just one romantic tryst can both upset and anger us.

That slut! That harlot!

I suspect women are somewhat similar with men, although the psychological factors are different. For men, it's about ego. For women... well I don't know what it's about for the.

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If there's one thing I dislike, it's a contrived camera or web camera pose.

It's funny to watch those who champion the virtues of deep thinking and intellectual discourse when they appear to spend more time trying to look like they are deep and intellectual rather than actually practicing their mantra.

The phenomenom is documented pretty well by this guy. My favorite line is "my lamentable plight".

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Oral sex, and cumming on the face in general, can be a very exciting way to finish off an office supply closet quicky. Of course, there are risks...

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Well, it's been a while, but I'm back. I've got this and two others drawn. I don't know if this will be a sustained release (huh, huh) or just a short spurt, so we'll see.

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When you break it off with someone, whether it be a relationship, or just a fuck-buddyism, the feelings of rejection will often produce an angry backlash.

A backlash in the form of insults and why they've always hated you. Except that, they went out with you. So in a sense, you can look at it as doing them a favor. They should thank you for breaking it off.

Yeah, I know I haven't done many comics lately. I've been super busy. I've been more backed up than Jimmy Dean's colon. I'll try to do a bit better, I promise.

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There's a type of person that I shall refer to as a "Mighty Morphin' Genre Chameleon". You know the type I'm talking about; they pick up a new genre -- and everything that comes with it -- at the drop of a hat. Sometimes it's to make others like them, sometimes (as in the case illustrated), it's to make a particular guy like them.

In mistakes of my past, I've done this before. I've tried to be something different so that people would like me more. This is, and always has been, a fools game.

Not too sound too "I'm good enough, I'm smart enough, and gosh darnit people like me", but being yourself is the best way to go. Not everyone's gonna dig ya, and maybe even a good number of people will dislike you. But the ones that dig what you're into, those relationship will be of a much higher quality, and much more rewarding.

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I have returned! And I bring you... Tales of Wang's Past. I explore all the stupid shit I've done, and how it lead to the nerd you read about today.

Today's tale is a tale of coercion. Sometimes, it's easy to coerce a statement out of someone you're in a relationship with in order to make the relationship fit what you want in your mind, without actually changing the nature of the relationship itself. The delusion is happy until your partner gets fucking fed up, and then initiates the break-up.

I've been on both sides of this. I've tricked someone into saying something, and I've been tricked into saying something. I've used it against them later, comforted by the feeling that I was wronged, and had the same done to me.

Now, of course, I realize I was the only one to have wronged, and I wronged her and myself for playing those stupid games.

My dear horny readers, I hope you've learned something from my tale of wang's past. Until next time...

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Even in the future, sometimes words are mistaken for other words, especially by the intrepid and horny crew of the USS Enterprise.

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You see it in message boards, blogs, craig’s list, Nerve personals – just about anywhere on the Internet that’s co-ed. Girls looking for LTR (that’s long-term relationship), and guy’s offering up “no strings attached” oral.

It’s like a dog selling a cat a bone on the merits of the fine gnawing experience. It just doesn’t have any appeal to the target.

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Here's a little form you can print out and give to your next retail love interest.

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I don't know if this happens to other people, but I often fall in love with the young and attractive retail slaves at the establishments I shop at.

While this may seem like an ideal place to meet people, remember, if you fuck it up, you may not be able to show your face there again. Hence the problem with retail love.

Yeah, I know. I've been a bad comic artist. No new comics in what, two weeks? Well, I've been having a little vacation. Also, I got a new haircut. Here's how it happened.

I'm sitting at home, looking at Internet porn, when my phone rings.

"Y'ello"

"Is this Tony?"

"Yes, yes it is."

"My name is Commander Data. You may remember me from Star Trek, The Next Generation."

"Holy shit, Data? Wow!"

"Yes. I want my haircut back."

My hair had grown quite long, and I was wearing it back, and sometimes it looked like Data's haircut. So I got a new one. It's called a "faux-hawk", where the top and back are longer, giving a pseudo-mohawk look. But not really a mohawk. Yeah.

Next, I'll be working on the MacGuyver haircut. Richard Dean Anderson, aww yeah.

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